Ｘ 记

表面看起来风平浪静的，心里却是不知所措。我觉得年轻的时候就不要过早去承担这种5 60岁才会遇到的问题。

太难。太痛苦。所以 要挺住 一定要挺住。

看到V写的那些后，心中就有一种快要窒息般的沉闷。那种感觉就像是掉进了深水中，拼命挣扎着想去到那丝光芒的源头，却怎么也抓不到。只有深呼吸才能缓过来。我惊恐着，看着这种差距，精神上的，认识上的。以及那些无法企及的目标。

作为同龄人。我在这里的目标是什么，我对梦想的定义是否跟他们比起来有巨大差异。这里，那里，anywhere。是否还有更让我们值得去做，值得去完成的东西事情。又怎么去完成，怎么去做。他一下子留下了很多问题给我。只能慢慢解答，又感觉无从下手，突然感觉时间的紧迫。2011-1-12

『所有的犹豫、恐惧都要在付出的同时才能洗去……』

——————————————————————————————————————
　　By the river Piedra I sat down and wept. There is a legend that everything that falls into the waters of this river—leaves, insects, the feathers of birds—is transformed into the rocks that make the riverbed. If only I could tear out my heart and hurl it into the current, then my pain and longing would be over, and I could finally forget.
　　By the river Piedra I sat down and wept. The winter air chills the tears on my cheeks, and my tears fall into the cold waters that course past me. Somewhere, this river joins another, then another, until far from my heart and sight all of them merge with the sea.
　　May my tears run just as far, that my love might never know that one day I cried for him. May my tears run just as far, that I might forget the river Piedra, the 2)monastery, the church in the 3)Pyrenees, the mists, and the paths we walked together.
　　I shall forget the roads, the mountains, and the fields of my dreams; the dreams that will never come true.
　　I remember my “magic moment” that instant when a “yes” or a “no” can change one’s life forever. It seems so long ago now. It is hard to believe that it was only last week that I had found my love once again, and then lost him.

　　我坐在彼德拉河畔哭泣。传说所有掉进这条河里的东西——树叶、昆虫、小鸟的羽毛——都会变成石头积成河床。但愿我能掏出我的心投进流水中,这样,我就再也没有了痛苦,没有了思念,没有了回忆。
　　我坐在彼德拉河畔哭泣。冬天里的寒冷让泪水冰凉地贴在脸上,我的泪水滴入冰冷的河水中,顺流而下。这条河在某处与另一条河汇合,然后又与另一条河汇合,直到在远离我心灵和目光的地方汇入大海。
　　愿我的泪水如此这般流向远方,让我的爱人永远不知有一天我曾为他而哭泣。愿我的泪水流向远方,由此我将忘却这彼德拉河、修道院、比利牛斯山上的教堂、浓雾,还有我们两人共同走过的道路。
　　我终将忘却我梦中的道路、山峰和田野,我的梦,不会实现的梦。
　　我想起了我那“神奇时刻”,那时,一个“行”或者“不”就可以改变一个人的整个人生。这好像已经是很久远的事情了。然而,令人难以置信的是这仅仅发生在一个星期之前,我和我的爱人重逢了,然而我又失去了他。

　　I am writing this story on the bank of the river Piedra. My hands are freezing, my legs are numb, and every minute I want to stop.
　　“Seek to live. Remembrance is for the old,” he said.
　　Perhaps love makes us old before our time, or young, if youth has passed. But how can I not recall those moments? That is why I write to try to turn sadness into longing, 4)solitude into remembrance. So that when I finish telling myself the story, I can toss it into the Piedra. That’s what the woman who has given me shelter told me to do. Only then in the words of one of the saints will the water extinguish what the flames have written.

　　在彼德拉河畔我提笔写下这段故事。我的手冻得冰凉,我的腿坐得发麻,屡屡有停笔的冲动。
　　“得生活下去。回忆是上岁数人的事,”他曾经说道。
　　也许爱情使我们有早于年岁的成熟,又或者在青春逝去时,使我们变得年轻。然而如何能不回忆起那些时刻呢?因此,我就提笔写起来,希望让忧愁变为思念,让孤寂化为回忆。这是为了等我把这段情史讲给自己听后,我可以把它抛入彼德拉河中。这是那位给我住处的女人叫我做的。正如一位圣人所说的,水能泯灭火所写下的圣洁的文字。

　　We had been children together. Then he left, like so many young people who leave small towns. He said he was going to learn about the world, that his dreams lay beyond the fields of Soria.
　　Years passed with almost no news of him. Every now and then he would send me a letter, but he never returned to the paths and forests of our childhood. When I finished school, I moved to Zaragaza, and there I found that he had been right. Saria was a small town, and as its only famous poet had said, roads are made to be traveled. I enrolled in the university and found a boyfriend. I began to study for a scholarship (I was working as a salesgirl to pay for my courses). But I lost the competition for the scholarship, and after that I left my boyfriend.
　　Then the letters from my childhood friend began to arrive more frequently and I was envious of the stamps from so many different places. He seemed to know everything, he sprouted wings, and now he roamed the world. Meanwhile, I was simply trying to put down roots.
　　Some of his letters, all mailed from the same place in France, spoke of God. In one, he wrote about wanting to enter a 5)seminary and dedicate his life to prayer. I wrote him back, asking him to wait a bit, urging him to experience more of his freedom before committing himself to something so serious.
　　But after I reread my letter, I tore it up. Who was I to speak about freedom or commitment? Compared to him I knew nothing about such things.
　　One day I learned that he had begun to give lectures. This surprised me; I thought he was too young to be able to teach anything to anyone. And then he wrote to me that he was going to speak to a small group in Madrid and he asked me to come.
　　So I made the four-hour trip from Zaragoza to Madrid.

　　我俩是从小一起长大的。像其他离开小城镇的年轻人一样,他也走了。他说他要出去见见世面,他说他的梦想早已飞出了索里亚(西班牙一座小城)。
　　他一走多年,杳无音信。后来偶尔能收到他的来信。但他再也没有回过我俩童年一起走过的道路和森林。中学毕业后我就搬到了萨拉戈萨(西班牙一个城市),在那儿我发现他是对的。索里亚太小了,正如该城唯一知名的诗人曾说过,路是用来走的。我上了大学,还交了男朋友。为了一份奖学金,我开始发奋学习(为了付学费我曾经做过售货员)。但是奖学金最终没有得到,之后我也和我的男朋友分手了。
　　我这发小朋友的信开始多了起来,看到信封上不同国家的邮票,我心生嫉意。他好像无所不知,他生出了双翅,在周游世界;而与此同时,我却在挣扎着站稳跟头。
　　(后来,)他的一些信,都是从法国某一地寄来的,当中总谈起上帝。在其中一封里他说他想进神学院,终身从事神职工作。我回信让他三思而行,请他在准备献身这么严肃的工作之前,再体验体验自由。
　　但当我读了自己写的信后,我却把它给撕了。我有何资格来谈论自由、谈论献身?比起他来说,我对此一无所知。
　　有一天我得知他开始在传教。我大吃一惊:因为在他这个年纪,传道还是太年轻了。然而不久,他写信给我,说是要去给马德里的一个团体布道,并且要我去一趟。
　　于是我花了四个小时从萨拉戈萨赶往马德里。

Paulo Coelho
保罗·科埃略

＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝

我始终坚持 那是一种信任 任何情况下一直相信着 就算分离了也一样坚定

Tom Doctoroff
North Asia Area Director of JWT advertising firm
Posted: December 20, 2010 02:15 AM

Just because China has embraced Christmas does not mean the country is becoming Western. Looks can be deceiving.
Christmas tunes play on radio stations. Every Grade A and Grade B office building in Shanghai, Beijing and Guangzhou is decked out with holiday displays. Christmas music is piped into elevators far and wide, even in Communist Party buildings. Santa, Frosty the Snowman and Rudolf, are ubiquitous. Department stores never used to have Christmas sales. Now they all do.
What's going on? One thing for is sure: the Chinese have not discovered Jesus. The meaning behind Christmas - the birth of God's son who died for our sins - can be articulated by a small percentage of the population. True, evangelical Christianity is spreading, particularly in the countryside where adherents can be quite passionate -- and brave -- as they proselytize the word of Christ. But, as a rule, mainland Chinese know very little about the deeper meaning of his teachings. In the eyes of most, China's Jesus is, more often than not, interchangeable with China's Buddha. He is someone to pray to, someone to turn to particularly in periods of uncertainty or fear. The idea of having a relationship with Jesus through acceptance of his "golden rule" in exchange for salvation is a nuanced abstraction. It is not a powerful offer for today's pragmatic, ambitious, worldly new generation of Chinese. In the PRC, morality is relative; standards shift based on ever-morphing external circumstances. But Christian morality is absolute. Jesus' word - charity to others, including the weak, particularly strangers - is non-negotiable. The tenets of Occidental Christianity are poorly understood and, frankly, unattractive as a consumer proposition. (By the way, most Chinese do not know the difference between Jews and Christians, let alone the difference between Catholics who acknowledge the Pope and Protestants who do not.)
So why is Christmas hot? There are two reasons. First, Christmas is win-win. It fuses fun, a universal release, with transactional gain. Second, and more subtly, Western holidays, particularly Christmas and Valentine's Day, are useful tools in reinforcing individual identity within a Confucian - yes, a Confucian - context.
To the Han, Christmas is not "Western." Instead, the holiday is "international" and "modern" and carries a whiff of status, the ultimate commodity in face-driven China. Santa is a symbol of progress. He represents the country's growing comfort with a new global order, one into which China is determined to assimilate, without sacrificing national interest. Individuals who make merry are making a statement. They are declaring themselves new generation players, able to absorb new elements and apply them in a Chinese framework.

On an even deeper level, Christmas is an investment in the future. Men here carry a heavy burden. In matters of the heart, women are demanding. Mothers-in-law will not approve of a prospective groom unless he can afford an apartment, an increasingly elusive requirement given skyrocketing real estate costs. Cars have become "must buys" for couples intent on entering the ranks of the middle class. Chinese relationships are rooted in dependability, not romantic love. Of course, the desire for passion is universal. But, in anti-individualistic China, a society in which the clan remains the basic productive unit, love is not enough to seal the deal. Men need to, first and foremost, prove themselves. They must establish their commitment in terms of both emotional dedication and material potential. The Christmas gift is one more opportunity for young Chinese men to proclaim, "Darling, I would do anything for you." It has been embraced by as a means of demonstrating steadfastness.
In 2010, Christmas festivities are still rather new fangled. (Chinese New Year, an extended-clan affair is inviolable, even for hip, earring-sporting cool guys.) For 15 years, however, Valentine's Day has been de rigeur. If a boyfriend does not give his girlfriend an expensive present, he will no longer have a girlfriend. The reason is obvious. Valentines Day's raison d'etre remains unadulterated: "show me your love." This drive explains the phenomenal spread of engagement rings. Diamonds are a new cultural imperative; they have achieved 85% penetration in primary cities, up from less than 10% in 1995. In China, DeBeers' tagline, "A Diamond is Forever" has been translated as "For you, anything is possible." (Pardon the generalization but marital practicality also reveals why a Chinese wife often looks the other way if her husband has a "happy ending" massage. She will, however, ask for divorce if he has a mistress, a much graver threat to a domestic "harmony.")
Chinese adoption of Christmas rituals does not imply "Westernization." It has been co-opted to advance a distinctly Chinese agenda: projection of status in a culture in which individual identity is inextricably linked to external validation.

Happy Holidays, everyone!

—————————————————————————

要是因为看到中国开始过圣诞节就认为中国已经西化那就错了，别被表面现象忽悠了。

圣诞节即将到来，圣诞歌曲在电台连环播放。中国上海、北京和广州的各档次写字楼里均装扮出圣诞节的气氛来。圣诞歌曲在写字楼的电梯里唱响，甚至在有些政府大楼里响起。以前，中国城市里的商场从没有圣诞销售专场，但是现在这些都有了。

中国到底这是怎么了？有一件事是肯定的，中国人并没有把基督当回事，只有极少数中国人知道圣诞节的来历。尽管基督教的影响在扩大（尤其是在乡下），但是对大多数中国人来说，基督和佛祖是可以互换的，在困惑和恐慌时可以求拜的神灵。

为什么圣诞节在中国这么火热？有两个原因。第一，圣诞节是个双赢的节日，卖礼品的商家得到了利润，消费者则获得了趣味和享受。第二，西方节日，特别是圣诞节和情人节，对加强中国人在孔学思想影响下的个性认同很有用。

对汉民族来说，圣诞不是“西式的”，而相反，在中国圣诞假期是“国际化”和“现代化”象征，夹杂着阶层和地位的气味，在这个“爱面子”的社会中是个终极商品。圣诞老人是进步的象征，象征着中国遵守全球规则和秩序获得不断增长。中国在没有牺牲国家利益的前提下，毅然决定融入进国际秩序中。中国公民个人宣告他们是新一代的弄潮儿，有能力吸收新元素，并在中国式的框架内用到这些新元素。

在更深的层次上，圣诞节是未来的投资。中国男人背负着沉重的负担，除非他能负担得起一套房产，否则就别想把媳妇娶回家。汽车也成为夫妻想要登进中产阶层的“必须品”。男人首先而且最重要的是证明自己，他们必须在情感和物质层面都有建树。中式的男女关系不是建筑在罗曼蒂克的爱情之上，而是看你是不是靠得住。而圣诞礼物就是青年男子向异性表达“亲爱的，我可以为你做任何事情”承诺的一个更好的机会。

中国接纳圣诞节礼节并不意味着“西方化”。圣诞节，与其他外来节日一起，推进着中国人一个明显的征程：在个人身份逃脱不了需要获得外部认同的文化氛围中设计自己的社会地位。

各位节日快乐！


= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =

所以说在西方人的眼里 中国式男女关系已经往物质取向方面更进一步，或者说是在物质基础上建立起来的。我不敢苟同，自从我们认识了爱情俩字，我们一直都在寻找这个传说在哪。况不仅仅只有爱情。但严苛的现实也摆在眼前。

作为一个既不是富二代，也不是官二代的不太靠谱的小青年 我表示压力越来越大了

好吧 大家节日快乐

写了很长时间 突遇这样被刷屏 有点小郁闷

之前说到 开心的小聚聚然后是忍辱负重的俞素鸡 面对这般压力 如此稳扎 要向他看齐

还有王老师的情况是第一次听到  只能祝福他 也更尊敬他了

家家都有本难念的经 每个人都只是想让自己过得更好

每次都会联系到自己身上 可以让自己思考很多

在取舍中选择

越发发现自己越来越重视事业上的发展

隐约记得上一次印在脑海中的日期是10月15日，而我一下子穿越到了24日。 这期间发生了什么，我甚至没有太多印象，是我睡迷糊了还是另外什么的发生了。 身边的有些事却好像昨日刚发生一样。 我想其中的这些人、这些事会是我今生最难忘记的！

　　
在某个聚餐的场合，
　　有人提议多吃点虾对身体好，
　　这时候有个中年男人忽然说「十年前，当我老婆还是我的女朋友的时候,她说要吃十只虾，我就剥二十只给她！
　　现在，如果她要我帮她剥虾壳，开玩笑！我连帮她脱衣服都没兴趣了，还剥虾壳咧！」
　　听到了吗？明白了吗？
　　
　　难怪越来越多人只想要谈一辈子的恋爱，
　　却迟迟不肯走入婚姻。
　　因为，婚姻容易让人变得懒惰。
　　
如果每个人都
　　懒得讲话、
　　懒得倾听、
　　懒得制造惊喜、
　　懒得温柔体贴，
　　那么夫妻或是情人之间，
　　又怎么会不渐行渐远渐无声呢？


*所以请记住：
　　有活力的爱情，
　　是需要适度殷勤灌溉的，
　　谈恋爱，更是不可以偷懒的喔！
　　
　　有一对情侣，相约下班後去用餐、逛街，
　　可是女孩因为公司会议而延误了，
　　当她冒著雨赶到的时候已经迟到了30多分钟，
　　他的男朋友很不高兴的说：
　　你每次都这样，现在我甚么心情也没了，
　　我以後再也不会等你了！
　　刹那间，女孩终於决堤崩溃了，
　　她心里在想：或许，他们再也没有未来了
　　
　　同样的在同一个地点，另一对情侣也面临同样的处境；
　　女孩赶到的时候也迟到了半个钟头，
　　他的男朋友说：「我想你一定忙坏了吧！」
　　接著他为女孩拭去脸上的雨水，并且脱去外套盖在女孩身上，
　　此刻，女孩流泪了
　　但是流过她脸颊的泪却是温馨的。


　　
你体会到了吗？
　　其实爱、恨往往只是在我们的一念之间！
　　爱不仅要懂得宽容更要及时，
　　很多事可能只是在於你心境的转变罢了！
　　懂了吗？
　　当有个人爱上你，而你也觉得他不错。
　　那并不代表你会选择他。
　　
　　我们总说：「我要找一个自己很爱很爱的人，才会谈恋爱。」
　　但是当对方问你，怎样才算是很爱很爱的时候，
　　你却无法回答他，因为你自己也不知道。
　　
　　没错，我们总是以为，我们会找到一个自己很爱很爱的人。
　　可是後来，当我们猛然回首，我们才会发觉自己曾经多么天真。
　　假如从来没有开始，你怎么知道自己会不会很爱很爱那个人呢？
　　其实，很爱很爱的感觉，是要在一起经历了许多事情之後才会发现的。
　　或许每个人都希望能够找到自己心目中百分之百的伴侣，
　　但是你有没有想过『在你身边会不会早已经有人默默对你付出很久了，只是你没发觉而已呢？』
　　所以，还是仔细看看身边的人吧！他或许已经等你很久了
　　
　　当你爱一个人的时候，爱到八分绝对刚刚好。
　　所有的期待和希望都只有七八分；剩下两三分用来爱自己。
　　如果你还继续爱得更多，很可能会给对方沉重的压力，让彼此喘不过气来，
　　完全丧失了爱情的乐趣。
　　
　　所以请记住，
　　喝酒不要超过六分醉，
　　吃饭不要超过七分饱，
　　爱一个人不要超过八分
　　
　　如果你也正在为爱迷惘，或许下面这段话可以给你一些启示：
　　

爱一个人，要了解，也要开解；
　　要道歉，也要道谢；
　　要认错，也要改错；
　　要体贴，也要体谅；
　　是接受，而不是忍受；
　　是宽容，而不是纵容；
　　是支持，而不是支配；
　　是慰问，而不是质问；
　　是倾诉，而不是控诉；
　　是难忘，而不是遗忘；
　　是彼此交流，而不是凡事交代；
　　是为对方默默祈求，
　　而不是向对方诸多要求；
　　可以浪漫，但不要浪费；
　　
　　 `*不要随便牵手，
　　 `*更不要随便放手  

= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = =


前半段被我删了 觉得没有更好一些

昨天傅哥要给介绍女朋友 实在没有那份心

有些事 我想陈姐姐说的是对的
 

You are wating for a train ...

A train that will take you far away .. 

You know where you hope this train will take you..

But you can't know for sure..

But it doesn't matter .　

Because we'll be together.

    这是一个美女空前多的年代。走在大街上，随便喊一声美女，保证能有一半人回头。可是，英雄在哪里？那个年代，国仇家恨、内忧外患，能人志士辈出。一边是战火纷飞，一边是痴痴爱恋。因为知道未来连生死都无法掌控，所以，分外珍惜现在。那时候，是乱世，分手大都是兵荒马乱生离死别；现在，是盛世，分手大都因为买不起大房子、买不起好车。也就是那个年代，才能出倾城之恋。生死交关之际，真心相见。倾覆一个大都市，成全一段爱恋；如今，只有明码标价、非诚勿扰。每个人都在衡量条件、比对标准。整个城市都在喧闹，看不见也听不见真心。

    这是一个最好的时代，也是一个最坏的时代。这是一个美女很多，没有英雄的时代。没钱的男人，忙着挣钱呢！有钱的男人，觉得自己不够有钱，忙着挣钱呢！还有一部分，忙着自我陶醉呢！很少有人能把眼睛从钱上挪开，看看别的。宽容、包容、大度、善良、有爱、勇敢……这些美好的词汇，似乎离我们越来越远。
    
    我们要怎样呢？我们能怎样呢？是要抱怨、纠结、难过、失望？还是努力保持自己内心的力量，始终相信爱与被爱，不受干扰，不受侵蚀。就好像那天晚上我们从餐厅出来，一路聊着笑着，从东四十条，走到三里屯，后来，坐在路边石椅上乘凉，心情平静。不管是朋友还是恋人，我们都需要那些内心有温暖力量的人。天长日久，会让你庆幸自己的幸运——有这样的人在身边，拉你站在阳光下。

＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ 

    那就庆幸身边有这样的几个人。可以陪我们一起走下去。

其实你想世界很大
我们的忙碌我们的烦恼都不是什么
该平静下来的都是要平静下来
该面对的或者该逃开的，便想清楚不要犹豫去做
重要的是给自己一个交代

＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝ ＝

朋友写的，从某种角度上说这是个不错的逻辑

既然喜欢，那就摘下来